Since schools started many of my friends have moved to another city or state. One of them was my friend who worked at the grill with me. He moved to college only about an hour away, and was given the responsibility of training our new busser. He did what we all thought was a valiant attempt, but either our new guy has a severe learning disorder, or he's just a straight up idiot. At our work a typical training period would be two days or so, MAX a week. Tardo is still in "training" and it's been over a month. He has a false sense of superiority because he's family friends with one of our waitresses, And he never get a god damn thing done. Not only that but rather than do side work or clean up, he gets drinks from the bar and just sips them in the back.
I also got another job! It's at A Bagel company and I thought it would be terrible and that I'd constantly want to be eating bagels, but its not so bad. When you're around them all days with out being able to eat it you can decide whether you really need it. Of course I still have my binging problem but WAY less. My coworkers at the bagel co are really cool for the most part and the job is not hard by any means.
Ok well the job stuff is out of the way, now to talk about the ED. I was having a hard time in Hawaii (not Hawaii it's self, but my step mom), and was stress eating the last few days. I gained a little but sense I've been back I've remained a pretty steady 122.2. I've also been working on trying to pin point what causes my binging. Sometimes I remember to think about it and sometimes I don't, but the main causes are: seeing decadent/tasty looking foods, thinking about tasty foods, thinking about how good I'm doing, thinking about how bad I'm doing, being bored. Pretty much everything I guess. But I don't want to talk too much about that today.
On to guys. As far as the guy department goes, I just as screwed as I ever was. I don't know whether its proper to say "have a crush on" so I'm just gonna say it. I really want to shmang this one kid. He's funny and nice, pretty sweet, very sexy, and just a good person to be around. But I can't gauge how he feels about me. We hung out the other day and things got pretty hot and heavy on my couch. He wanted to have sex, but I said no. It's not because I didn't want to (trust me) its just because I have a rule. The rule is no sex on the first date, and I'm pretty sure that wasn't even a date. So the next day I really want to hang out cause I went the one date with out, and he never texts back. And then he texts me the next day and I reply and he never texts back. And then I text him and he never texts back. It's so frustrating! On one hand I wanna shmang and on the other hang I want to shmang a guy that'll actually text me back.
Then there's this other guy. He's really attractive too. Super cool, likes the same music, funny, friends with some of my friends, looks like he's 18... But he's sixteen. So now I find a guy who is super cool but he's like a year and a half younger than me. And I really don't think age matters, but other people do, and I don't want them thinking I was so desperate I had to date down. I mean usually I'm into older guys, he's just really cool. But guess what! He can barely fricken reply to e text either. Don't get me wrong. I don't want a guy who'll text me 24/7. That's just a recipe for clingyness. I just want a guy who wants me. And I feel like none of the ones that I want do.
Except one other guy who's friends with my care giver. My friend just texts me and tells me he likes me, which took me completely by surprise because the dude doesn't talk to me. He has rad hair and is super nice, but I can't hang out and do it with a guy that can hardly talk to me. I don't know what's wrong with me but romantically I'm fucked. No pun intended.
That's all for today!!
